This week has been rough on my family. Below is a post I put in a "Parents of Paws (Childless not by Choice)" group on Facebook describing why it's been a rough week and also reflecting upon what it takes to be a parent to furbabies only. I'm reposting this here as it's something I'm passionate about and something that is near and dear to my heart. TW for Pet euthanasia, Grief and Loss:
Originally posted 22 August 2023:
Yesterday I lost my 17 year old Maltese terrier Gizmo. We sent him over the rainbow bridge devastated that age and dementia had taken him away from us long before his heart stopped beating. He was my first dog, and amongst the tears I got to thinking......
We really are a brave and intrepid bunch.
Our lot in life is one of unsinkable optimism. We give our hearts in wild abandon to bottomless eyes and snuffly wet noses with the FULL and complete knowledge that our hearts will be broken; knowing full well that the likelihood of us outliving our little ones is extremely high. We do it knowing that we will have to nurse them into old age. We will pay for medications, for heat pads, for special foods, for blankets and coats and special beds, and steps and ramps and vet bills - Yet we do it anyway.
Imagine if parenting children were like that - imagine if you went through all of that effort, that pain, that energy, that LOVE, knowing that 10-15 years down the line you would lose that child, often having to actively MAKE that decision? Imagine then that you sign up to that, over, and over, and over, and over again and each time you will pick yourselves back up, put yourselves back together, take one step, then another, and then another, and then eventually you WILL try again. 
Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of parents out there that DO go through the loss of a child - but imagine if that were basically a certainty?
We subject ourselves to this and give our WHOLE hearts for THEIR whole life, knowing that the end will come and that the end will be unspeakably painful. And we do it knowing that once they are gone there will be a hole in your heart and in your life that you will never ever fill.
It's not something I actively thought about when I brought home my first kitten at the tender age of 21. I sent that beautiful boy over the rainbow bridge just over a year ago having been diagnosed with stage 4 kidney failure about 4 months prior. He was one month shy of 18 years of age. It's certainly not something I thought of when I bought Gizmo at the tender age of 23. But as I get older, and as the wound of childlessness scabs over, its something I think about more and more.
People often tell me that being a parent is the hardest job in the world. Maybe they're right, unfortunately I won't ever have that lived experience. But I do know this - you and I dear reader, are a special breed of human. We surrender ourselves to a selfless, unconditional, pure love that only a pet parent can fully appreciate - but we do so knowing that the flip side of that coin is pain and loss.
And we'll do it again.
And on a personal note:
Goodbye my little mate - until we meet again x
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